THE MINDSET OF THE SELF-CONFIDENT (Part Two)

How to Build Self-Confidence

The first time I discussed this was in my 100 level in Michael Okpara University of Agriculture Umudike in Abia State – my Alma mater. I was delivering a talk to 400 level students when their lecturer silently sneaked into the lecture room and decided to listen. I didn’t know when he came in but I noticed the class was a little more distracted; and some students were looking at me and giggling. I spoke on for another 10 minutes and with each minute, my presentation became more intriguing and before long the room was silent. I had everyone listening and I didn’t mind the number of eyes staring up at me.

When I eventually finished with what I used to call “Turbo Talks” then, I told them that I am able to stand before them to teach about building self-confidence because I had a particular awareness which most people desire but don’t have, I knew it was right to share my knowledge and I earnestly wanted them to live above the limitations of their self-esteems. The ovation that I received was marvelous  but what got me feeling fulfilled was what the lecturer said when he met at the exit. He asked me to wait a while that he would like to add something to what I was saying. He told his students that he was told I was a 100 level student of the institution. He noted that he heard a little of what I was saying and wished his students could put them to practice. That he was yet to see any student with the kind of confidence I just displayed teaching people that were way beyond me even as a fresher.

Over the years, I have written and spoken about what I discussed with those 400 level students and almost always, I receive calls from participants sharing their testimony about a sudden surge in their confidence. So I can assure you that, if you have a low self-esteem but truly desire to be bolder or more confident, and you do what I will be asking you to do here, you will experience a change in the way you evaluate yourself. You will discover you could do most of what you were shy of doing.

Now you may wonder why you actually need to build on your confidence. The truth is: you can hardly reach your dream without self-confidence. Before you can embark on any great venture, you have to believe in that venture, in your ability to pull it through and in God’s ability to create the opportunity for you to excel in it. Recently, I helped 4 families secure grants of between 7 million and 10 million Naira from the Nigerian government. We worked on their business plans together. My secret was simple. I communicated the confidence my clients had in their proposed businesses and their ability to execute those businesses and viola! today they are millionaires. My friend Ronald Nzimora (Nigeria’s finest Information Marketer does the same thing). His sales letters always assure buyers that he is confident the content or product he is selling will make them a better person.

Similarly, if you have read the biography of any great person you will discover that success in life has strong ties with self-confidence, self-awareness or what many describe as one’s belief in themselves. This is why you should take this article seriously. This is why you need to invest your time practicing what I will be sharing with you here. Just so you are forewarned. People have a way of ignoring what they are being taught free of charge. You probably stumbled upon this article and I can understand if you try to ignore it. You won’t find its content with a price tag attached anywhere online, you are advised to take it as one of those free gifts that can change your life for good. I want to remind you that the most valuable things in life are free including the grace of God, happiness, companionship, air, and love, etc.

You can develop a very sound self-confidence by adopting some attitudes and behaviours; but you will have to be consistent in it until you can act them out unconsciously. I will list the tips here and continue with more details soon.

• The influence of being honest, truthful, fair and upholding justice
• The willingness to share what you have with whoever needs it
• The power of knowing what you want
• The power of recognizing what you are good at and developing the skills to excel in it
• The confession or affirmation of who you can be
• The ability to understand your field and the players in it
• The wisdom to value human relationship
• The tenacity to venture through the road less traveled even when it seems risky

Do you want to know what those tips have to do with making you more self-confident? Hang on. We shall continue this later, so you use your time to do what you came online to do. In the meantime, share your expectations and thoughts in the comment section and I will reach you once I publish the full content.

I toast to a better YOU!

THE MINDSET OF THE SELF-CONFIDENT (Part One)

Have you ever wondered why some people are confident and their confidence is contagious? The secret of the self-confident is in the content or makeup of his or her mind. The difference between a confident person and a timid person is the quality, firmness and clarity of their minds. A confident person has a victor’s mind set while a timid person has a victim’s mind set. Now the question is what is a victor’s mind set?

A victor’s mind set is a set of beliefs, awareness or knowledge that convinces the person that he or she has what it takes to influence, to take charge and to win. It is a special kind of viewpoint that makes it very difficult for you to perceive failure or intimidation. It is different from courage. Courage is the action you take with this mind set even when faced with an impossible, obscured or dreaded situation.

For the self-confident, there is hardly a dead end; dead-ends happen when people lose faith in their ability to move further. You are self-confident when you believe strongly that what you have inside of you is influential enough to push you through the way that the Almighty has made for you. Self-confident people act, and not react. They influence and not respond. The conviction that victory awaits them in the future makes their actions today so contagious that you keep wondering where they get their energy from!

Self-confident people are also people of strong faith or hope. They walk into a room knowing they will leave behind a positive impression, pick up challenges knowing they will handle them, go after the person of their dream knowing it will always end well, serve and pray to their God knowing they will get answers etc.

The truth is; it is the lack of self-confidence that makes it difficult for many people to receive answers from God. Faith has a strong bearing on self-confidence. If you are not confident about your position in the Kingdom, you will be ignorant of what your inheritance is exactly. So how can you ask and receive what you don’t know exists? How can you ask for what you don’t know you deserve? How can you believe you deserve anything when you don’t recognise your worth? How can you be self-confident, without recognizing your worth?

To your success!

How Tonto Dikeh Drunkenly Embarrassed Herself In London

Drinking is fun, getting high can also be fun but when a traditional African super celeb loses it on stage before a London audience because she is tipsy, it stops being fun. It becomes a question of home training and how important good composure and behavior is to the celeb.

When I saw Tonto Dikeh falling and ranting on stage under the influence, I wished I could just walk into my laptop screen like  "Ghost Dad" did when he tried to scare off his daughter's chaser through phone and give her a whopping in the a**. But two things were wrong with my wish. Firstly, I was no Ghost and secondly, I am not Tonto's dad. I was also unhappy about the guy who brought her on stage knowing fully well she was out of her mind. Yes someone will say, "could anybody have been able to stop her? She had to earn!" But come on, you could just give her some sleeping drugs so she can wake up after the show.

I mean anything would have been better than letting that stubborn girl ruin the image of Nigeria female celebs which the likes of Omo Sexy and Genny are working tirelessly to protect from caricature.

Come to think of it; what is it with Tonto Dikeh and weird news? That pair seem to be nondetachable.

Watch the video: Tonto Dikeh is high!

Timaya's "Ekeloma Demba" Set to Take Out Kukere, Azonto et al

Guys, i don't usually do entertainment on my blog but wow, Timaya's new video definitely has some potentials i find hard to ignore.

His latest singles (which is still in making) sure has the potentials to take over the wave in the club.
I predict that "Ekeloma Demba" videos will take over the wave for a very long time and possibly shut out Kukere and Azonto. Nice beating: kukerable and azontish...but with some grand flavour..

TARIBO WEST wonders why ..?

Taribo West, one of Super Eagles' finest defenders in history, who is now a devoted clergy, has been accused of cutting down his age by at least 12 years. It happened in 2002, when he joined a Serbian team (Partizan Belgrade) and claimed he was 28, when supposedly he was 40 years old as purported by the former President of Partizan, Zarko Zecevic in a Daily Mail report.

Mr West responding to the accusation that he had subtracted 12 years from his life while joining Partizan, denied not knowing what the President was saying, and wondered why the issue was raised 10 years later.

According, DailyPost Nigeria he complained

"I don't really know what they are talking about and that's why i don't really have anything much to say."

"But it is curious that they are raising such matter about 10 years after i left the place. Why was the matter not raised while i was there? Why talk about it long after i retired from the game?"

My own question is, the President mentioned West still performed better and as expected in his play; there was no mention of any quarrels or problems; then why this sudden revelation?

I can only suspect Taribo has stepped on some toes in his church

Am out!

How close can we get to the solution?

Recently i was wondering how much more is needed to be done to crack the development puzzle in Nigeria. Will it have to take another 50 yrs, 40, 30 or .... are we already in the magic decade when the world will start celebrating our country. India and China has already proved to the world that anything is possible with economic development. According to one article "To be precise, in 25 years from the current period it has been assumed that China will have a more superior economy as it already leads the total output in the world". Yet these were countries who, as at early last decade, was nothing to write home about economically. Today, however, virtually all the big boys are establishing their domineering presence in these countries.

Basically, Nigeria has all it takes to make a great leap towards economic greatness. It is the most populous black nation with about 150M people with different skills, talents, qualification and experience. The country boast of a 69% adult literacy rate, 87% male youth (15-24) literacy; 81% female youth(15-24) literacy rates (UNICEF). She also has large agriculturally fit land mass and enough energy resources to power up industrial activities. You may wonder what else is keeping us back.

I really do think we are not too far from the promise land. If only we can start taking leadership serious, the speed will be terrific. We need people who can help us efficiently manage the vast resources at our disposal as a country. Nigeria will be great and when this happens, the whole world will want to identify with us. This makes the struggle all the more interesting.

Nigeria can borrow a leaf from the Chinese and Indians. They built relevant socio-economic infrastructure and also encouraged research and development of cheap-yet-durable technologies. The result was spontaneous.

Revelation: Why Tuface and Annie Wedded in Dubai

The answer to the question "Why Did Tuface Wed in Dubai?" will probably end like "...what she wants".

Initially when I heard about Tuface's wedding in Dubai, I was crazy...I couldn't understand why. This is someone we all loved and wished the best for and yet he couldn't even let us have the chance of sharing a wonderful moment in his life with him. I thought how foolish it was to leave your country and go to tie the knot in a strange land where you have little or nothing to do there. 

Then it occurred to me that I could be wrong....I mean "what if his bride's parents lived their?" Yet it was hard to shrug off the idea, as the wedding was something far above Tuface. Tuface is a super star, and he is one because millions of people think he is cool! As a star, you stop belonging to yourself, you become a public property and so everything you want would be crosschecked by your fans (not fair though, but that is what you get for the paparazzi).

Later, Boko Haram crossed my mind. I immediately discarded it. Those guys don't bomb weddings or attack super stars and even Tu Baba knows that. They still have a large gang of politicians to deal with, a superstar would be a complete distraction.

I also thought it was just about the swag. Then I asked myself which swag? Dubai na glorified Alaba Market...love-net far from im description!  Also, Tuface doesn't strike me as the type that believe swag is about travelling abroad to host shows. He gets his real swag doing his thing here in Nigeria. 

Much later, when I logged into my facebook, I saw countless posts and updates, criticizing Tuface for what he did. Before, the wedding, people were very impressed that he had finally stopped acting like a boy. There were messages of happy married life for Tu Baba spread across the internet and everybody was looking forward to the day, it came as a shock to many when they discovered few days to the wedding that the ceremony was fixed in Dubai.

It was a shock to me too and I was heart broken. It felt like Tuface doesn't regard me one bit. It was painful because, he is my favourite musical artist. Don't think it was such a big deal o! I wasn't that beaten up, I just didn't see it coming and I couldn't understand why.

But days on, while I was reading through one of the updates criticizing him for what he did I suddenly realized that he might have done it just for his bride: maybe that was "what she want"(ed). As I thought more about it, I knew I was right. I came to love him more. I imagined what he risked to make sure he delivered the first marital wish of his bride. Tuface, is a confirm "Naija boy". He would never have given up acting like a naija boy, except it was really necessary.

That thought gave me peace on the issue.

Soyinka And Clark: Should let Achebe Rest in Peace

I received news of Chinua Achebe's passing away in Boston USA with a heavy heart. He was a great Nigerian. He was one among few who are inspirations to Nigerians and black people all over the world. His life was full of great accomplishments. 

One would expect every Nigerian would respect his memory and pray for his soul to rest in peace; but this has hardly been the case as some people are trying hard to play security politics with  his death. 

(Wondering: Why we too get intelligent people for this country sef?)

Please read what i saw on Wole Soyinka's and J.P Clarks' joint statements:

“These are forces that arrogantly pride themselves implacable and brutal enemies of what Chinua and his pen represented, not merely for the African continent, but for humanity."

“Indeed, we cannot help wondering if the recent insensate massacre of Chinua’s people in Kano, only a few days ago, hastened the fatal undermining of that resilient will that had sustained him so many years after his crippling accident.”

What is it with respected Nobel laureate Wole Soyinka? Did he have to play out his paranoia on something as sensitive as suggesting Chinua Achebe's death was facilitated by the bombings in Kano? Now he drags, J.P. Clark, one member of the "pioneer quartet of contemporary Nigerian literature" with him on this claim which even a child would know is too unnecessary to make. 

The past week was a little tense. There were rumours of reprisal killings in the southeast after the Kano bomb blasts. Statements like those could be taken entirely out of context and soon you will find people on the street maiming their nieghbours to revenge the death of a demigod.

As much as I understand how much Soyinka and Clark miss their colleague, I think their statements were misguided and quite unnecessary.